The Ophelia Project, a non-profit dedicated to raising awareness about RA, states that there are no gender effects in RA. Although inspired by Pipher's 1995 book on adolescent girls, the Ophelia Project's website states:
"As our research progressed, we found that there are no gender effects when it comes to relational aggression. Today's boys need our help just as much as today's girls. Our mission evolved over time to encompass both populations, and we are also branching out to explore the issue of covert aggression in the adult workplace.
I am all about Ostrov: observer bias is definitely going to have an effect on how children's interactions are rated. In a real-world setting, it's also going to have an effect on how those interactions are handled by the child. You know when a toddler falls down and you don't make a big deal about it so that the child doesn't get more worked up? There's certainly some of that with social stumbles as well. I spent most of my life overreacting to rejection (real or imagined). I still have trouble with it. Talking with my mother on the phone last week, I found out that she does too, and I wouldn't be surprised if that's not a coincidence.